The Confessing Lunatic

God is directing. We are responding. Satan is attacking. Wednesday was a powerful time of prayer in response to God's directing. I've known for months that God was instructing me to speak up and I have been miserable because I stayed quiet. Wednesday I couldn't hold back any longer...so I spoke up. Who knew that it was going to be the right time? God did. A movement has begun with our family...the family we used to call Pleasantview Baptist. But evidently Satan doesn't want us to move out in God's direction because I can feel the attack we are under. Our good friend, Jackie, told us immediately after the service that she has a "suspicious" looking lymph node. I got home and got an email that I allowed to steal my joy. Then there was something else to throw me. I confess...I became angry where in just an hour before, I was at peace. Jim sat down at the kitchen table with me and said I had to pray right then and there. Truthfully, I wanted to hold on...

This past Sunday I shared with my Sunday School class the verses from Hebrews 12 that got me through my overwhelming week at work. In fact, we studied the first twelve. This week has been no less overwhelming but God knew I would need confirmation of His presence. As I was reading tonight, I clicked on Average Girl and discovered my confirmation. Her last post talked about the same passage in Hebrews that I had been reading. God is so cool - to speak through others whom I have never met but share a bond with is just awesome. So, thanks God.

Blogging ... I confess, it's not something that I ever would have imagined I'd be doing. I scoffed at it before I knew the why or how or what of blogging. I discovered blogging because a good friend started one when she found out she and her husband were going to have a baby. I loved reading about how her pregnancy was progressing and now seeing pictures of her baby. Every night, even when I don't have time to blog myself, I catch up on several bloggers that I read regularly. I don't really know why I am drawn to these people - most I have never met - except that they provide a surprising comfort to me with their words. They are dealing with things that I deal with or have a perspective on life or the Bible that I causes me to re-think, dig deeper or just contemplate over. Others are just plain funny. Several such posts come to mind: Stick with me...this is funny and not a personal reflection The Nearness of God It's Going to Be a Great Day The Choices We Make ...

Yeah! School is just around the corner. Aside from the obvious reason to love going back to school - buying new school supplies (yes, I love new pens, pencils, crayons, markers but that's a post for another day) - we are excited about coming to the time when the necessity for routine comes around. I confess...we've been a little lax in the Billman household when it comes to bed time, chores, and the like. School is just the thing to put our household in order... I think. It's Saturday morning and the older kids spent the night with my parents. The little ones are still asleep because we let them stay up to watch a movie and sleep on the couch bed. I should be cleaning or something yet I've wasted a good hour and a half just hanging out in Facebook trying to find friends from high school. I got in to update my profile to add my new graduate school. Yes, that's right. As if my life weren't crazy enough, I'm going back to school. I have this awesome o...

I confess...yesterday I was feeling bit overwhelmed. Work, as I've mentioned before, has been frantically busy. Yesterday was no different. I got an email from our new administrative assistant that had a scripture verse in very small type at the bottom of it. The verse was just what I needed to read at that moment so I thought I would share it with you - plus the verse before it. I've printed it and it's now just under my monitor. Today when decisions needed to be made and I couldn't focus, I read through the verses. "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." Hebrews 12:2-3 So, feeling a bit overwhelmed? Fix your eyes on Jesus. He's been through it all and then some.

I confess...I am wondering what I have gotten myself into. About two months ago I accepted a supervisory position at work. I never fooled myself into believing it would be easy, but I never fully believed it would be this hard. Don't get me wrong, I am having the time of my life. Work has never been more fast-paced and fun. I love what I do and the day just speeds by; this I really like because it makes the time away from my kids less painful. We're hiring as fast as we can to help with the workload so there's new people to train as well. I like training, teaching and showing others just how much I love the work we do in Fort Worth. But...there are personnel issues, decisions to make, and a host of things I can't really talk about. I thought being a Mom would prepare me for most of the stuff I would have to deal with. It just never occurred to me that I would be using my Mom skills dealing with grown-up issues. So, I could use your prayers. Lots of them. I am ...

He's home! Jim and his team arrived safely around 2:00 p.m. today. We've had a wonderful afternoon...Jim hasn't stopped talking about all that he saw, heard and did in Egypt. As we were driving home, he got choked up when he was talking about going to the mosk and watching a man and two his sons. He said that the father was showing his sons how to pray and the sons were just soaking every word and action up. We have men in our country who will show their boys how to "be a man," how to play ball, how to get good grades in school and some how to treat a lady BUT there are far too few showing their sons how to pray and be a man of God. This trip has obviously had an impact on Jim and I can't wait to find it all out. Thank you again for all your prayers for Jim and the team's safety. Please continue to pray for Josh and his family. They have a lot of work to do. So apparently do we.

He's coming home!! Jim sent me a text telling me he's in Frankfurt and waiting for his flight home. He gets in around 2:30 tomorrow and I can't sleep I'm so excited. The last couple of days the team has taken some time to be tourists. They went to Cairo, Egypt to visit the pyramids, sphinx, sail across the Nile, and ride a camel! They went shopping in the market in Cairo and he said it was absolutely CRAZY. He did a lot of negotiating with the vendors despite the fact that he really didn't want to. I'm so thankful that God has answered prayers for their safety and my sanity (though at times I felt on the cusp of losing it big time). Thank you for all your prayers! We are so thankful for everyone! One last thing...we are tentatively scheduling a debriefing at the church on Sunday morning, August 24th. We'd love to have you!

Just a quick update - I was able to talk with Jim earlier today. He said "Things are going well. Please tell everyone to keep doing what they're doing." So, keep praying! God is good and I can't wait to share with you all once he gets home all that He has done! Love you!

I missed Jim's calls yesterday because I was in a meeting. I did hear through the kids that he ate some interesting Egyptian food and was enjoying helping Josh set up his website. I received a text early this morning saying he'd been to the "port" and it was amazing and that they'd been to a mosk. I just received a text from Jim today saying it had been a great day. Earlier in the day they went to see the fishermen take their boats out. He said in his text he "pulled in some nets with some fishermen" and saw some catacombs. Though he can't say it, you can fully expect that he is having great conversations about other fishermen from long ago who met THE fisher of men. Continue to pray that he has opportunities to tell the Story.

I talked with Jim today while he was at the home of their sponsor, Josh. It was about 10:15 p.m. there and they were working on setting up a website for Josh. I didn't have much time to talk to Jim because I was late for a meeting at work. But he sent me an email of his experience at the zoo, I thought I would share with you: " Things are going well. We went to the zoo and took pics of people. It was incredible. The people are very friendly. I have had some great talks with taxi drivers. It was sad for the animals. They are so mistreated but the families there were great to shoot." (video that is...) Please continue to pray for their safety and the opportunities God has for them to minister. Pray for me and the kids. My brother and his family are back at home in Canada but my kids had grown accustomed to staying up late with their cousins that they have had a difficult time settling in at night. I am so worn out from work and playing host that my patience is thin. ...

Jim called at 11:15 pm Egypt time...that's 3:15 p.m. Texas time. He was getting ready to turn in for the night. He said it's a completely different culture - there were still plenty of people AND their children out and about despite the lateness of the hour. He said his room that overlooked the Mediterranean didn't have air conditioning so they were moved to a different room. He said the room wouldn't have been so bad but he had to leave the window open and it was noisy outside. Hopefully tonight he'll get caught up on his sleep tonight since he only had four hours the night before. They went to the zoo and to the beach to get some video. He said the zoo was a far cry from what we have here...I'm sure we'll here more later. He did say he's had a great time riding in taxis and getting to talk with the locals. He said he had to be very careful about what he said or put into email or text. Even as he talked to me there was a policeman watching him. Co...

Jim sent me a text when he got to Frankfurt, Germany to tell me they'd made it safely thus far. After their 12 hour layover (and walking around in Frankfurt), he sent a second text to tell me that he was getting on the plane. I got a third text when they landed in Egypt and a phone call when he got to the hotel. It was 4:00 a.m. Sunday Egypt time when he called. He was going to rest in his hotel room until 9 when he had to meet his team. He said his room overlooked the Mediterranean. His room is small and old but it is clean. He said things are very "different" there. I'll try to get more from him next time. He said that some of the mission work is being done at the beach so please pray that God will give the team an opportunity to share and be praying for those at the beach that they would be open to hearing the Word. Love you all!

Jim is leaving Friday for Egypt. I confess...I am a little apprehensive. I'm not apprehensive for his safety. He is a big boy and I know God will be with them every step of the way. I'm not apprehensive for what he will be doing; he is a wonder at what he does. I am apprehensive how I will handle things at home and church without him plus get to work and be sane. But, I have to say I have wonderful parents and in-laws that will take care of me. Having said that, that's not really what this post is about. For the last couple of years Jim's heart has been burdened because our church has not been sending. I have had a similar burden. This week as I was preparing my Sunday School lesson, I came across the following quote by Mendell Taylor, "The Church must send or the Church will end." While I see that we are responding in a small way by sending Jim to Egypt, it simply cannot begin and end with him. The Great Commission was not a suggestion...it was a c...